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what a SH*THole scary day


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Last night was habitual...12:36 am attack...screamed, banged...slept. Woke up. Coffee,shower, took soon to school. Haad appt for dentist.

I generally do not take freezing needles well. Usually have to tripple if not quad my dosaged. When I had DBS and they put halo on my head. Instead of 4 needles. It was 21. Thats just me.

30 min into it, drill comes out...i start crying. When I had DBS I was awake. DBS is a hole drilled into my head when they insert and electrode into my hypothalulous.

anyway. I sucked it up and continued for another hour fairly ok. I explained to dentist and assistant it was flashback but id be ok. Dentist was very empathetic.

He said ok we done the 3 fillings now we polish. Out of the blue I panic. Room spinning 100 miles an hour, I feel I want to vomit, pass out. Worst feeling I had since being awake during brain surgery. Its so hard to explain but something wasnt right. They tilted the chair back more to let blood run to my head but it felt worse. I tried twice to sit up. Bad move. Frig...am I gonna die. My eyes rolling back into my head. Is this it? WTF happening to me?  Scared to death...dentist calls me ambulance. Dentist office is old house converted to practice. I am on 3rd floor down spiral stairwell. Two skiny paramedics show up and see oh crap I am well above the 260lb mark. They get a run down of my vitals. Tell me sugar very low.(sorry dont eat breakfast), and got me ina  chair. I start dry heavng trying to puke, I have my eyes roll back. Dentist explains I had DBS...oh he has Parkinsons...umm no he has Cluster Headaches. Huh what. Its wired to his brain? He looks at the tattoo on my arm. says wow. never heard of that...

5 hours later at hospital, check all vitals, blood work bla bla bla...im ok ...oncall ER Dr comes and says...I dont think your depressed. I think you have PTSD. As my wife and I explained last week watching NIP TUCK that I had sorta similar crying freakshow during brain surgery spisode drilling into someones head...flashback...she explains...(excellent bedside mannor) how its normal and ok and stop trying to be a macho man and get some help....so I emailed my neuerosurgeon and asked for a referal.

Hard for me since I blog about being strong...being positive and trying to help people globally look outside the box. That I am human...Strong like Bull Dumb Like Ox.

Well Im home now. Still very light headed, dizzy and nautious and scared as hell.

Maybe the next attack I have make me feel like my old self again...what a friggin day.Oh and my back is out again too.

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I got hit at the dentist once.   This was due to administration of Xylocaine

w/EPI in the dentist's office. This stuff triggered me hard. In

dentist visits thereafter, I was given Citanest (Prilocaine) without

EPI and did not get triggered with this. If anybody has problems with

attacks while at the dentist, it may be worthwhile to inquire about

what they're using on you.

EPI = epinepherine

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