Psiloscribe Posted March 9, 2014 Share Posted March 9, 2014 I received some terribly tragic news today that I'll share here because I know that some of the old-timers here will remember who the news is about. When Clusterbusters was just forming, I was contacted by the wife of a cluster sufferer. So I have known these people though email, postings & phone calls for about a dozen years. I am deeply saddened and downright distressed to say that I heard word today and confirmed this in news articles, that Jaques Dreyfus, known here and in the old yahoo group as Rex Tangle, took his own life and that of his wife, Heather. They were living in Portland when this happened a couple of weeks ago. News was being withheld because they needed to locate his family living in France. Heather was one of the nicest and most caring supporters I have met. Jaques, an accomplished musician always appeared to be a gentle and loving man. I am at a loss as to why this has happened. I probably never will be able to understand this terrible act and loss. Rex actually wrote a 10 song album for Clusterbusters many years ago. An instrumental set that was meant to be used as a peaceful background set for listening. One of the tracks was used for years on our old website. I'm sure some here remember listening to the tracks. I know some have the CD. I imagine the how and why isn't important. I do know that Jaques suffered greatly with clusters. He went through many of the same obstacles we all seem to traverse. I know he once flew home to France to have major dental work done in an attempt to "fix" his clusters. I know that when they moved, Heather called looking for help in finding a good doctor and help in getting set up with 02. She would always be the one reaching out for help for Jaques. Maybe that was part of the problem. Rex couldn't reach out for help himself. I guess that is one reason I'm even posting this. To let everyone here know that if you need help, reach out for it. You owe it to yourself and you owe it to your supporters. There hasn't been a person born yet that hasn't needed help at some point. Leaving it up to your spouse or other loved ones is not only not fair, but destructive to yourself and your relationship. Everyone here knows how difficult life can be. No one would ever think less of you for reaching out for help. Quite the contrary. Reaching out shows not only strength but a determination to make a better life for everyone involved. I know that Rex had some very close friends here and I hope they don't mind my posting this. Rex did his share of supporting others here. Sometimes it's easier to offer support than ask for it. If you're interested in checking out his website, this is the link; http://www.rextangle.net/bio.html R.I.P. Heather and Jaques! Bobw Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alleyoop Posted March 9, 2014 Share Posted March 9, 2014 Thanks for posting this Bob. I too am both saddened and distressed by this news. I remember Rex and his wife from the old Yahoo board, so it's been quite a few years since either were active on the boards to my knowledge. I remember listening to his CD a couple of years ago, and wondering how he was doing. She would always be the one reaching out for help for Jaques. Maybe that was part of the problem. Rex couldn't reach out for help himself. I guess that is one reason I'm even posting this. To let everyone here know that if you need help, reach out for it. You owe it to yourself and you owe it to your supporters. There hasn't been a person born yet that hasn't needed help at some point. Leaving it up to your spouse or other loved ones is not only not fair, but destructive to yourself and your relationship. Everyone here knows how difficult life can be. No one would ever think less of you for reaching out for help. Quite the contrary. Reaching out shows not only strength but a determination to make a better life for everyone involved. Amen R.I.P. Jaques and Heather. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spiny Posted March 9, 2014 Share Posted March 9, 2014 That is terribly sad to read. It points out that there can be a terrible outcome to this disease. Finding this board and the wonderful people here has been a sanity saver for me. It has let me know that I am not a wimp nor am I alone. I think that you are right Psiloscribe when you say the patient needs to reach out and make contact personally if at all possible. Thank you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mrweekend Posted March 10, 2014 Share Posted March 10, 2014 Thanks for the info. They will be sadly missed. RIP Jaques and Heather. I hate this disease! Please ask for help when you need it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ClusterHeadSurvivor Posted March 10, 2014 Share Posted March 10, 2014 I am deeply saddened to hear of this...tears of sadness for there families, for us for anyone in that deep dark place. God speed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ClusterHeadSurvivor Posted March 11, 2014 Share Posted March 11, 2014 I am still very upset over this news, I cried as I shared it with my wife and son and said this just sadly validifys our disease once again. This is now the 4th time in the last year and a half I have heard of this. How many more people have or will take their own lives before we get the help we need and or recognised for the disease??? I blogged about Suicide awhile back, discussing my dark days in dec 2008 and how close I came and how since my life has changed. My heart pours out for anyone that is in that dark place, I am personally sh*t lucky I have not because what I have been through in my life. I am sending a virtual hug to all of you CH ers out there...Wishing, praying for relief for all of us. God help us Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marc Posted March 16, 2014 Share Posted March 16, 2014 With 14 years of being chronic behind me, the suicide part I can understand. Not the murder part, sorry - that's just plain evil. Marc Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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