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tingeling

Feeling down

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Hi

Had a longer period now where i can`t really do much with CH. It affects me many ways. I kept up with my routines. Eat, sleep, exercise and all that. Now i am at that point where i don`t care. I know i have to do it and i do it. But i don`t care about it. I don`t care about anything. Usually i find almost everything fun in one way or another. Very childish that way. Not now.

Been baby sitting today. This person, she always feel sorry for herself. Always complaining about how tired she is can`t get enough sleep. Only around 7 h.... When she asked me if i could look after her child from 7.30 this morning, i answered yes i can. BUT, my daughter is sick, she`s home from school having a fever at 39. And i`m not on top either, but if it`s important i can do it.  It`s up to you. She came 8.30, she was so tired this morning.

I received a text later on, telling she was finished, but went home to relax. As her child was afraid of the O2, i told her after one h to come because i really needed to do something about it. She came, sat down and complained again. So tired, before she could sleep whenever she wanted, around 12 h, now only maybe nine or seven. And now the trolley was wet, standing under a roof on the terrace, then she couldn`t roll it trough my house. Well, you need to get out and roll it to the car i told her. She wanted me to do it, she didn`t want to around the house. After awhile of this ranting i just felt like i had to leave or something.

When stuff like this irritates me, i don`t like to be me. I feel embarrassed complaining like i do now, but i just had to get it out. I feel depressed actually. Have no apetite, weight is going down, that stuff. And i don`t know what to do when i can`t use LSD, shrooms or seeds. If i just could stop feeling so sad. Sometimes i wonder why i always keep searching for new options. Now i have to do it for my daughter of course, it just feel so difficult sometimes.

Thank you for being here

Tingeling

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Well that's the first step; letting it out!  Thank you for letting us know how you're feeling.  You are an important, helpful member here.

Try to find something, anything that you can do about your current situation.  Pick one problem at a time and do something, anything to gain at least a little control over it.  It's also possible that your "employer" is more negative than most and should be avoided if possible.  Long walks and physical tasks can pull you out of your head and onto your environment.

Try the above, keep posting, and let us know how it's going.

Keith

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Thank you Keith :)

I`m on the move almost constantly. Even when i eat, most of the time. I use every trick i know of. My body weight is 45kg and i loose weight quickly. Today my arms don't fill my stretch sweater no more, not gonna weigh in before i gain weight again now i think.

You gave me a very constructive answer here. Also you kind of resumed what i said, without the rant part ;D

pull you out of your head and onto your environment.
Very important. Because i have no problems, i`m just feeling sorry for myself, and i don`t like those sneaky thoughts. "When the amount of idiots pile up, look at yourself". Have no clue how this quote is in English, direct translation from Norwegian ;D

Well, now i gonna go outside in the rain and get wet. Hopefully this will give me a "cold shock" shivering.

Never underestimate the power of sharing!!

That helped!!

Hope you`re good, wish you well :-*

Tingeling

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1000 POSTS!!!! Yay Ting! You've given of yourself 1000 times to help strangers. Maybe you don't feel too good about yourself just now, but look at all the people you've helped to feel better about themselves. You're a hero to a lot of people, Ting. Thanks a lot for being there for all of us. Ron

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1000 POSTS!!!! Yay Ting! You've given of yourself 1000 times to help strangers. Maybe you don't feel too good about yourself just now, but look at all the people you've helped to feel better about themselves. You're a hero to a lot of people, Ting. Thanks a lot for being there for all of us. Ron 

My friend said it all here!!!  Thanks a lot from me as well girl!!!!   PF thoughts and wishes Ting!!!

DD

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Those words touch my heart Ron, thank you :)

Now i had to wipe my eyes here. Isn`t it odd, how powerful this is? I turn to my family on Internet, and i get support time after time. Really amazing!!

You are all highly appreciated. Thank you for being here :)

Thousand hugs,

Tingeling :)

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Thank you Denny :)

(You hit the post message button before me, fast for a person at your age, so young of course 8-))

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That is always ok 8-)

About that uppercut, i weigh 45, she weigh around the double, maybe more. Could be dangerous to me, but i`m a fast runner though ;D

Thank you Bejebeer :)

BTW, what does your name mean?

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*hug*

I admire you so much, Ting. It takes courage for you to share the feelings that many of us would rather skate around - Depression.

Lack of sleep and chronic pain is enough to make even the strongest person feel overwhelmed and sad. My heart hurts for you. You're dealing with so much and I know you're distraught over your daughter being sick, too. You're doing all the right things by keeping active and being social. Just please be careful - be aware and willing to seek medical attention if things get too dark. While it may be true that many anti-depressants/anti-anxiety drugs can block our alternative treatments, please don't let that be a deterent for getting help if you need it.

Something that I haven't tried, but am considering is the Licorice tincture. Ron reports that Michael has had much better moods since taking it. Is this something you have tried?   

I'd like to add that I don't think you are necessarily feeling sorry for yourself as you mentioned. You're tired - physically and mentally. My experience with people who feel sorry for themselves is that they tend to be selfish. It's always about them. You're far cry from that! You're a kind hearted and compassionate person who continuously looks out for the well-being of others. Unless, of course, we're talking about those rotten neighbor kids you chased down when they picked on your daughter. ;)

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Actually i tried the tincture. I tried for several days in row. I get hit everytime. It was a really bad thing for me. Or bad timing, have no clue. I will come up again, think it`s typical high cycle. Weight falling is a big factor in this as well i think, make your head spin a bit more. I eat allot, but i eat very healthy. I force myself to eat, but it doesn`t help right now. But soon it will.

I`m not afraid to seek professional help :)

Took advantage of your rain dance today, holding ice to my head, this alone could cheer up a person ;D

Thank you for thinking of me Kaboom, you are one kind hearted person yourself you know!!

Big hug to you kaboom :)

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Agreed that Ting is continuously looking out for the well being of others - when she isn't hunting them (snowball throwing kids) down.  :D

I don't know how either of you - Ting or Kaboom - do it, with the continuing chronic attacks, and routinely getting hit while busting even.  :o

For the definition of toughness in the dictionary, I think it could simply read "Ting/Kaboom". The dictionary folk should go ahead and use that for the definition of perseverance too!

Y'all have earned tremendous admiration around here.  :)

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Tingeling,

I read your post earlier today. Been thinking about you all day. Wish I had an answer for you. If conditions were more normal, I'd say get a nap, have a drink, have a smoke, take a hot bath. But wait, those are all triggers and will only hurt, not help CH.

I think that is what is so bad about this condition, there doesn't seem to be any escape. No place to hide. No place to cry, when you have family worrying if you aren't your usual cheery self. You could talk to a friend but you feel like that friend is tired of listening to you about your weird symptoms.

And so it goes!

All I can say is don't let that silly woman in your door.

And yes, go dance in the rain more.

Hey, I made a rhyme.

                              Leslie ;)

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My face almost look like it did before now. Like a ghost on the left side. It looks wrong, like it don`t fit, two heads put toghether wrong. Odd.

I decided to dose with seeds next week, or weekend. i take the chance of an allergic reacton, this doesn`t help. So i feel better having this as a "carrot".

When we tell eachother thing, what is important to everyone, is recognition from the other part. Usualy this is easy, everyone can relate to a toothache, cold, sprained(?) ankel and so on. This thing here, CH, to find recognitian in people so they can understand, that`s hard. But recognition in others are very important, it leads to that community feeling.

This woman, she has a wonderful child and a very kind husband. She do not work, she has a great family. When i had my daughter, i lost between 2-3l of blood, CH came days afterwards and stayed. 14 days later i was working full time. My family wasn`t there to help. What made me so sad yesterday, the last drop in the glass, was that after all this complaining from her, year after year. How and why do people stand this? And what make me so unbearable, so they let me down? Because i do not mention CH to anyone almost, i don`t rant about feeling sick or tired. But i must feel awful to my friends, because they`re not there for me. And i was sad because i wish she could feel lucky, she won the lottery. A healthy kid, a loving family, new big house, nice car. Maybe we humans get confused by all the things we have. Just made me think.

Today is a new day :) We are in charge of our own thoughts, i take control again today. What i think is what i get.

Leslie, i took a raindance, had a lollipop in company with O2. That is pretty much the same as nap, drink, smoke and hot bath. Only triggerfree ;D

I wish everyone a wonderful painfree day. Your support are highly appreciated. This is the only place i feel home to share how i feel.

Go and feel lucky with me today :)

Hug

Tingeling

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Hey Ting, Sorry you're down. I can relate...was there beginning of the year. I decided to write, which I think helps. It's a good form of expression because it doesn't need to go anywhere, or you can share it if you want. I don't mean just posting, but more like journaling, really getting it out. Helped me a lot.

Feel good because you're great.

-Chris

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Hallo :)

Sending you some good vibrations! Been feeling ok this week, so I have some leftover good-vibes for you :)

Did you get them? Sometimes the vibes get stolen on the way. Vibestealers.

Anywhos, you know, some day soon you'll feel better again. I've been down all year, finally up. But when you're down its kinda hard to look up.

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Ting, when I read your post I hear your voice, peace and love, thanks for all you do for us, hope you fell better soon...

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I got the good vibes. Think i got good vibes from all of you folks, because today i been feeling more like the usual me. A wonderful person stopped by my house today. When you wish for good things, good things will come, and it always does :)

Thank you so much razorPP, hope your doing well :)

Chris, i write, i don`t know what you can call it, but i think it helps allot as well. I gonna check out your site today.

Kleinsopp, looking forward to meet you next week!!

Wishing everyone a wonderful evening,

big big hug :-*

Tingeling

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Thank you Mad6string, you were right :) Feel so much better today, CH has loosen it`s grip a bit as well. I have no idea why, i think it was you folks :)

Wishing everybody a painfree, enjoyable weekend :)

Thank you for all your support!!

Hug

Tingeling

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