I'm in the market for a new head.

[b.g.]

It's time for a complete head transplant.  My old one is broken, and the maintenance fees are killing me.

I'm thinking this would be the perfect time to upgrade as well.  Hey, if I am going through the hassles of a new body part, I might as well take all the perks I can get right?

Here's what I am looking for in a new head:

I would like blonde hair and blue eyes.  My old head has these features and I grew very accustomed to it.  I would prefer my new head to have an extremely sexy bone structure.  Chiseled jaw bones, solid cheeks, sparkly white teeth, and a smile that will make ladies weak in the knees.

I'm not too picky about the size, so anything right around average will be just fine.  If you have a head that fits all my 7 1/4" fitted baseball hats, that would be a tremendous bonus for me.  I do need to be a little picky about the color (for aesthetic purposes/color matching I would prefer a caucasian head). 

I'm also going to need a brain with some power to it.  I am prepared to pay a little more for a 130+ IQ rating on the brain.

I'm also looking for a disease free head.  No cluster headaches, or dementia, or anything crazy like that.

So if you, or anyone you know has an extra head that matches my description, please p.m. me with your asking price. 

[Bejeeber]

Brilliant idea!  ;D

Too bad there couldn't be a worse place to shop for a high end replacement than this bargain basement forum. Tuff crowd. 

CHfather's noggin is clearly really good in the IQ dept. and cluster free, so he's one of the few premium cranium candidates around here - just do NOT let him try to pawn off his pancreas as part of the deal. He'd have to pay YOU to take that thing. BUYER BEWARE. Also, it should be disclosed up front that his head can't eat MSG.