Jump to content
ClusterBusters
Sign in to follow this  
Ruairidh

Hi there. Y'all saved my life.

Recommended Posts

Hi. Name's pronounced 'Rori'. 

I battled unremittant chronic CH with upwards of a dozen distinct hits per day from mid 2011 through fall of 2017, and can happily say that I have had nothing but light shadows since my old hippy mother found the Busting method here and my somewhat sketchy connection came through for me. 

At the time of the attacks I had worked to convince myself that what I was experiencing was a mild form of the disease -- only after they faded from my life did I understand what I had simply grown accustomed to. No, wanting to trepan ones self to stop the pain is not a mild symptom. Loss of motor control and blackouts due to pain are not mild. 

The title says it all. For six years I was functionally disabled (though the medical establishment says otherwise), socially isolated, and completely controlled by the raft of CH triggers I experienced, which seemed to range everywhere from sleep to caffeine to spicy foods and dust and... just... I think that the whole world would be best described as one big trigger. I wasn't able to drive a vehicle or operate power tools safely, couldn't ride a bike or walk quickly, couldn't get around florescent lights or anything that produced a frequency, and my doctors... 

Propranolol gave me the blood pressure of a corpse. Amitriptyline made me forget my name and address. Imitrex and Topomax made it worse, if at all possible. After I refused to take the Topomax my Neurologist refused to see me. MRIs and CAT scans came back 'perfectly normal'.

Then finally the stars aligned . . .

I went to a liberal arts college (the CH started right after graduation) and friends had given me magic mushrooms in the past. I had been hoarding my single remaining baggy trying to make microdosing work. Nope. Not effective. 

And then I met a girl who drank too much, and needed a miracle of her own. Where my personal thoughts to myself were to Gut Up and Deal (see above re: mild case? I'm from a Navy Family...), I found that where I lacked the audacity to reach out to friends for my own sake, when I fell in love with a girl who drowned herself in minimum half a liter of vodka daily and knew she wanted out, I found that strength, at the moment when my network had a solid connection. Its amazing what you can do for others when your own strength is failing (again: Navy family).

Several ounces of psychedelic and two years later, I am still cluster free, able to see, drive, hold down a job, and THINK, while the girl who is now my wife hasn't touched liquor in two years. 

Yeah. Y'all saved my life. Thank you. Keep fighting. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Thank you for the testimonial.  The substances in question help reset the brain to remove the craving.  It still takes love and work to avoid the circumstances that enabled the craving.  These molecules are not "magic pills" they are only tools to battle demons.  Congratulations to you both

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
6 minutes ago, Pebblesthecorgi said:
  •  It still takes love and work to avoid the circumstances that enabled the craving.  These molecules are not "magic pills" they are only tools to battle demons. 

Jesus, this is true. I should say that the healing process was about a year, during which we did weekly professional therapy with a supportive therapist as well as weekly dosing. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
Sign in to follow this  

×