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Thanks alot friend. Means alot to me. Seriously does. Wishing you a lovely day.

Well there's no denying that you went through some terrible experiences and my heart hurts for you for that. While you can't change your past, you can create your future. With everything you've endured, I would imagine that you are incredibly strong (you are a cluster head afterall)! Keep your chin up and continue putting one foot in front of the other. Our past plays a huge role in who we are today. If you were stripped of your past you wouldent be YOU (not saying that you should have went through what you did) just that your stronger then most will ever understand because of it. Keep being STRONG... You got this!

I go off into the higher realms of consciousness during cycles. It's pretty easy to do when you are exhausted from no sleep and been tripping on stuff for weeks. During the worst attack in my life I heard dancing queen playing in my head note for note like it was really playing. That one was weird!

I know how easy it is to be so mad at this condition and the number it does to us. I find that for me, practicing being as kind and compassionate to myself and then to my loved ones really does help. Staying as calm and peaceful as I can (both while having an attack and during pain free time) helps to lessen pain and attacks overall. I know it is SO MUCH easier said than done. But just try and practice compassion in every way you can, starting toward yourself and it helps. Sometimes what I do to facilitate this is I imagine myself as a 16 year old kid getting these attacks for the first time. I think about how scared he was and how alone he felt and how much pain he was in. I feel so, so sad for him and just want to hug him and tell him everything will be ok and comfort him the best I can. Then I take all of those feelings I’m experiencing toward the young version of me and extend them toward present day version of me. Compassion and care and empathy toward myself. For me it helps to calm me down and lessen overall pain and suffering.