Jack,
As Denny says, a lot of us got our hopes way up for the availability of BOL through the company called Entheogen, which we were told year after year was on the verge of success, until it collapsed. I won't do that again, but will wish you well if you want to give it a shot. You expressions -- "quick, safe, reliable, affordable," etc. -- seem vastly optimistic to me, but maybe a smart, young, innovative, entrepreneurial fellow like yourself can make it happen.